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Divno Jé's Lessons fom Lyrics

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Music often speaks to the soul.... Here are a few lessons we've picked

up along the way (click on the song title for a link to the music video).

"Crooked Smile" by J. Cole ft. TLC

Now don’t get me wrong- I am all for adding in manmade products to assist myself in reaching a desired look. However, when was the last time we are removed all these additives and really looked in the mirror? When we do what our typical response? A look or shock, discontentment, or even horror? Are we looking away from the mirror? This my Wonderfuls- is a problem. Our clothes, makeup, and accessories are enhancements to our already existing natural beauty. When we start depending on these additives to define our beauty, and essentially our self worth it may be time to reevaluate our self-esteem, look within in and start defining our beauty and self-worth by the make up of our character. Every now and again, it is not a bad idea to take it off- take it all off and stop and stare in the mirror and remind yourself how beautiful you are. Naturally and without any enhancements or added extras.

"Ex Factor" by Lauren Hill

In any type of relationship, when we have to make changes to who we are in order to receive the treatment that we need and desire- it is time to reevaluate the relationship. Now this is not for those who know they are not doing right by the other individual. This is for those individuals who are honest, genuine, kind, open, and proactive; yet the relationship is leaving us feeling depleted and as though the things that we need are missing. Relationships are work and they have ups and downs- yes. At times, relationships will even been extremely difficult and require patience, intentional efforts, and sacrifice- yes. However, when we find that we have given so much of ourselves that nearly nothing is left, that is a problem. Relationships do require compromise and even submission at times- yes. However, when we are constantly giving of ourselves and changing who we are, in order to get a reaction from the other individual or influence that person to return our actions or affections and meet our needs, it may be time walk away. People do what they want.  While it is necessary for us to communicate our needs and feelings, as well as to make it known exactly what we need in a relationship, we should not have to continually ask, beg, compromise, and sacrifice our needs.

"Big Poppa" by Notorious B.I.G.

Biggie said it best and he let the ladies know what men like (to type of woman a man holla's at is different from the type he settles down with). Don’t lead with skin- it’s not cute. While you may draw attention, it comes along without respect. The most memorable women are those that are well-dressed, well mannered, and appropriately covered. Women who are ill-mannered, hanging out of her clothes, and have outrageous makeup are usually remembered in a negative light- if at all. Our aim should always be to present ourselves as classy and tactful (it also doesn’t hurt to be slightly mysterious- because not everyone needs to know everything about you). In this way, we avoid becoming the running joke, but instead we leave a positive and lasting impression.

"Who You Are" by Jessie J
There is this great misconception that we need to have everything together all the time- on top of having everything figured out. There is a negative connotation related to being sad or falling onto hard or difficult times. Essentially this is a part of life. Life has its ups and downs- some times are better than others. During those times when things may not be the best, it is okay to acknowledge how we feel and even act in such a way. How we feel is relevant; in fact- it is extremely important. We don’t always have to be fine, or be ok. Actually “its okay not to be okay.” When you have bad day, don’t just brush it off or try to suppress it. Take a step back and do the following: Acknowledge how you feel and allow yourself to feel that way without judgment or shame. Ask yourself what has got you feeling that type of way?  Take the time to sulk, cry, grieve, be angry, do nothing, or respond in whatever way you feel necessary. However, do so within reason. Sometimes you need five minutes to pout, sometimes, other instances like significant losses, take much more time. After taking the time that you need, either continue on in life or make an effort to reach out to resources around you that will help you continue on in life.   Finally learn what you can from the situation in order to be better prepared for the next low point (because it is going to come) and continue living life.